I love how sunflowers remind us to keep our faces lifted up, looking to Jesus throughout the day. Scientists call it heliotropism. Jesus calls it discipleship.

While running our race, we have to fix our eyes on what is unseen and eternal (2 Cor. 4:18, Heb. 12:1-2). Peter learned this that windy night while walking on the Sea of Galilee. "When he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, 'Lord, save me!'” Immediately, Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?” (Matt. 14:30-31). That word, doubt, carries the idea of being pulled in two directions. We don't know which way to take (Vines). Doubting is when a believer wavers between trust and fear. Peter learned when he kept his gaze on Jesus he could fully trust, but when he looked away, there were plenty of reasons to fear. 

Practical atheism—saying we believe in God but living our lives as if he doesn't exist—is one of the challenges we face. We believe and then we don't. It was a problem for Peter, too. Remember what Jesus said to him after he tried to walk on water? "You of little faith...why did you doubt?" (Matt 14:31).

We want to live hour by hour aware of God's active presence, but it's challenging. Rolheiser says, "Learning to see the finger of God, divine providence, in the big and small events of our daily lives is the...spiritual exercise we must do to move beyond our practical atheism" (Shattered Lantern, p 170). So how do we learn to see God throughout the day?

Something was missing! The way we had been discipled established a solid theological foundation, but it was incomplete. As many of us found, it left us focused on what was easy and external, while leaving unattended the weightier matters of the heart. Over and over, Jesus teaches us we need to pay attention to the inward movements of the heart. True growth happens in our inner spiritual life (see Matthew 23).

In my times of suffering, Jesus has used the love of my Christian sisters to love me on his behalf.

Has God given you something to do during this season of your life?

Moses was in mid-life, tending his father-in-law’s sheep when God called him. Moses saw a bush on fire, but it wasn’t burning up. He could have ignored this oddity out in the desert, but instead he walked over to check it out. It was then the Lord called to him “Moses! Moses!” God told him he was standing on holy ground, then he said, “I am sending you to Pharaoh to bring my people the Israelites out of Egypt” (Exodus 3). Moses couldn't believe what he was hearing, but our omniscient God had a plan. 

Do you find your mind wanders when you are trying to listen to the Lord during prayer? The church fathers thought wandering thoughts were dangerous because they dissipate the warmth of the soul and our heart grows cool. As I read this, I was convicted. What should I do about my wandering thoughts?

The church fathers gave practical advice: Spend time focused on heightening your sense of the fear of the Lord.

When we bought our home, we had an inspector go through the house. He went under the house to check the foundation and found that over the last 28 years, the beams that supported the floor of our house were not tied securely to the foundation’s piers. The house would stand, but in the event of an earthquake, it may not hold together. We should have it looked at.
 
When was the last time you inspected your foundation? Many of us have been building our spiritual houses for 10, 20, 30, 50 years, so it may be time to climb under our houses, so to speak, and make sure everything is still tied together. I learned this the hard way twenty years ago.

I remember feeling so disconnected from the Lord. I was actively involved in ministry but feeling totally out of it.  I had no idea what I needed, but I knew that I needed something. My husband was feeling the same thing. Our model for ministry was to give ourselves fully to loving people and teaching the Word. And five years into our ministry, we felt like we were going through the motions, doing the right activities but our hearts weren't in it. We knew something needed to change.

A story is told of a mother who pleaded with Abraham Lincoln on behalf of her son who had committed an act of treason. A war court found him guilty and sentenced him to hanging. His mother sought a pardon. Lincoln granted her request but said, "I wish we could give him a little bit of hanging." Sometimes, we, too, need half a hanging because nothing drives home the blessings of a pardon like standing on the block with the noose around your neck and hearing your sentence read. Thinking about God’s justice is like a little bit of hanging. 

Glorifying and enjoying our eternal God—what might that look like today?

What if we thought of our time of morning devotion as an activity designed to help us achieve what we have been designed for? What if we used our devotional time to find joy in the faithfulness of God, to experience joyous pleasure in his beauty as reflected in creation, and to find perfect love in Jesus? How might this approach to our time with God change us?

I remember being mocked the first time I went on a personal spiritual retreat. Everyone thought it was hilarious that I brought what looked like my entire library. I was “the bag lady” from then on. I had a wonderfully glorious day despite all of the teasing! Thirty years later, I’m still the bag lady. I never know what I’m going to feel like doing during my retreat, so I bring it all.

I knew Kevin was called to be a pastor. And I fully embraced my role as the pastor’s wife. But I didn’t think I had received a call. I didn’t think volunteering was a “calling” because it was not a paid, full-time job. I guess I equated calling with a vocation—a job. I had a more general call: all people are called to love the Lord, love others, and do their part to share the gospel, disciple people, and seek to advance God’s mission in the world. But I didn’t have a special, specific call.

But what if discerning our calling is a spiritual formation conversation God invites us to have with him during the various seasons of our lives?

How can we work with the Holy Spirit to cultivate patience? Certainly, we can count to ten, we can take deep breaths, we can write all about it in our journal, we can rehearse in our minds a favorite verse of Scripture, we can go for a jog, or we can take some advice from Frozen and just “let it go.”

Recently, life overwhelmed me and I lost my sense of joy. I felt strangely dead. Even my connection to the Lord seemed to disappear. I could make a list of God’s amazing attributes, all good reasons to praise him, but I wasn't moved.

When we aren't joyful, is there anything we can do to draw near to the Lord with sincere devotion? I can hear my mentors saying, “Press on. Feelings aren’t important. They're fickle. They come and go.” That's true. But throughout Scripture, we're exhorted to pay close attention to our hearts.

Is there anything we can do to help our hearts engage with the Lord again? I think so.

I was flying to Chicago and although I had my own books to read, I started flipping through the Southwest Airlines magazine. I never read the airline magazine. Tucked inside was a nugget of wisdom, hidden treasure from the Lord.

It's really easy to get buried in too much work, only to have one more thing come up that we must do. Of course we say, "Yes," and before long we are living overwhelmed. I've been quite surprised that even during retirement when I'm not reporting to a boss, I still find myself running ragged. It seems that no matter what stage of life we are in, the only way to have some time to rest is to schedule it.

How can we make progress in our struggle against sin?

We are "fearfully and wonderfully made," yet we find in ourselves an incredible bent toward selfishness and overconfidence in our own abilities. Earlier generations expressed this truth by saying that we are “crooked timber.”

Is there anything that we can do?

Over the mountains and the sea
Your river runs with the love for me

Are there prerequisites for Christian ministry? I think so.

Jesus really wants us to know His love. When we get to heaven, I think He will ask us, “Did you know that I loved you?” He wants us to float in the river that is His love. He doesn’t want us to just stand alongside the bank of the river getting splashed every so often. He wants us to jump in, be fully immersed, letting the current carry us downstream. That's a prereq for ministry.