Importance of Accountability and A Small Trustworthy Group of Women
Becky Boone Austin
In previous posts, Becky writes about the importance of leading from our identity in Christ and embracing God's call to be a ministry leader.
For me, finding a small trustworthy group of women was the best and worst requirement as Director of Women’s Ministry. Very early in my new role at the church, our lead pastor required all of us in leadership to find an accountability partner. We had to provide him with the name of the person. While this seems authoritarian, it was for our protection. Our lead pastor had experience with two men, who were “famous” pastors, who had moral failures and walked away from the ministries they founded. No one falls into sin, rather we allow small compromises into our life that allow sin to not seem as sinful. These accountability partners were there to help us navigate the stresses and strains of ministering while being people-in-progress ourselves.
Accountability
The first time I met with my accountability partner, I felt as though I had just stripped myself bare in her presence. I revealed my areas of lack of trust, bitterness, and resentment that had built up in me, and the hurt of rejection I had experienced just a few months prior to taking on this role.
I am very thankful that when God has called me to various positions, He has been very specific with me. On the days I wanted to walk out, I knew that was the place that God had me, and it was for my good and His glory. Maybe not that moment, but later.
My accountability partner walked me through a grinding-to-dust season in my personal life. She gave me perspective when the frustrations of ministry were overwhelming and reminded me of my calling when I wanted to quit. She cried with me as God used the role of ministry to rebuild me from the inside-out.
Pray for God to show you who can support you as an accountability partner who can hold space for your hurts and speak truth into your life. It could be a counselor, or it could be a woman, or small group of women God raises up for this specific purpose.
Accountability Partners
By Kim Bagato
Accountability is accepting responsibility for your actions and being vulnerable with another about the choices, challenges, and courage necessary to flourish. It’s asking (or being asked) the hard questions and being honest, even when it’s hard. It’s accounting to a trusted friend what’s really going on in your life. “Two are better than one…”
The example of not going it alone is found numerous times in the scriptures. God made Eve because it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone. Moses and Aaron led the Israelites together. Ruth promised to go wherever her mother-in-law Naomi went after their husbands died. Mary and Martha were sisters and friends of Jesus.
Col 3:13 - Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Gal 6:2 - Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.
Heb 4:13-16 - Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.
Romans 14:12 - So then each of us will give an account of himself to God.
Matt 12:36 - I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak
Remember it’s important to have someone you can be completely honest with and who is trustworthy to have your back. Choose a person you respect and who will support you through the highs and lows of ministry.
Tips to Finding the Right Person As An Accountability Partner
When you are seeking an accountability partner, you are looking for someone with whom you can be vulnerable and feel supported. It’s important to look for:
Someone you admire and respect
Someone with whom you can be yourself
Someone who is trustworthy and will keep what you share confidential
Someone who has time and can make the commitment to support you
You may already know someone who could fulfill this role in your life. Or maybe it is someone you don’t know well but feel comfortable enough asking.
It may take a few tries before you have the right person/people in place. Once you do, you’ll feel less stressed knowing you have support to lean into when you have questions or challenges. They’ll also be there to cheer you on and affirm your successes as you lead in ministry.