Why does God answer some prayers and not others? I honestly don’t know. I’m so thankful that God provided a wonderful husband in Ben. I couldn’t be happier! Ben was married previously for 24 years and his wife, a physician, was tragically murdered in front of her medical clinic. They never had children. To this day, we still both struggle with showing up at church on Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. Unanswered prayer can be deeply painful.
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Three and a half years ago, my husband, John, had a stroke. It left him a little less able to do what he had done before, and year after year we are “outwardly wasting away.” When I look to the future, I don’t know what’s coming. I desire to know the Lord. I tell him about my concerns and circumstances and share my joys with him. As I’ve learned, he desires to share himself with me. He wants to pour out his heart to me in his Word and through his Spirit.
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It is deeply healing to know that the circumstances that threatened to distort our stories are the very places where God’s glory was planted within us. His presence closes our wounds, gives us the ability to forgive, and allows us to fully grieve losses. These things remain part of our story, but how we tell it is reframed to reflect the goodness that God brings through each chapter.
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It all started on a Thursday in August. I woke up during the night in severe pain. Even the smallest movement caused shooting pain through my core. The pain was so bad I almost cried.
For almost three weeks, I struggled to feel better, wondering if pruning trees for a few hours had caused such a problem. I sat most of the time because I experienced excruciating pain in my ribs when I moved.
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We have an omnipresent God, always waiting and ready, prepared to give us what he knows we need in all the moments in our lives.
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Have you ever found yourself lacking the motivation to open your Bible apart from just knowing you should? I found myself in a dry spell like that for years. Recently, God has been so kindly and organically developing my love for his word in connection to our relationship. Sadly, somewhere along the way (or maybe from the very beginning) that got disconnected for me.
But, God.
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My life had plenty of rubble. It was such a challenge for me to surrender my plans, hopes, fears, and need to be in control over to Jesus and allow him to be my guide, teacher, and the unconditional lover of my soul. I know we all come from diverse backgrounds and life experiences, and this may not be your story, but personally, I found it uncomfortable to receive. I wanted to be the captain of my ship and the master of my own fate. I did not realize that this was where the embers of sin began to set fires in my life.
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He loves her so much that he called me seven months before to come across the world to Kenya! Yes, he knew what she needed that day before she did. That is amazing love!
You are infinite love. Your love is uncontained. Your love is not meant to be contained. It is to be lived out.
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Several years ago, I was privileged to attend an adoption ceremony that touched me deeply. A special family was adopting a precious little boy. As the official proceedings took place, I experienced a fresh insight into our relationship with our heavenly Father.
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There’s one thing about the Holy Ghost. You just never know when he’s gonna make something into a teaching moment. So, a couple of weeks ago, when I was thinking about the Kingdom of God, and praying, “Your kingdom come, O Lord,” the Holy Spirit said something that upended some of my theology.
“Don’t you mean our kingdom?”
For a second, I didn’t know what to think.
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